


Just a Pinch

by TetrodotoxinB



Series: A Close Shave [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Background Sam/Bucky, Bets, Bucky's a little shit, Embarrassment, Gen, Pranks, The Author Regrets Nothing, awkward steeb, genital talk, medical procedures (off screen), shaving genitals
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-25
Updated: 2017-07-25
Packaged: 2018-12-07 01:01:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11612664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TetrodotoxinB/pseuds/TetrodotoxinB
Summary: Bucky and Steve are asked to shave their balls...for science. Steve is awkward as hell and Bucky is a punk. That's the entire plot.





	Just a Pinch

**Author's Note:**

> Beta'd by [brideofquiet](http://archiveofourown.org/users/brideofquiet/pseuds/brideofquiet).
> 
> This was inspired by having to help my husband shave his balls for his vasectomy. The writing of this was enabled by everyone on the SBB slack. You're all terrible people and I love you.
> 
> If you enjoy this, feel free to subscribe to the series because there will be more.

“I’m gonna need you to run that by me one more time,” Bucky said, arching his eyebrows.

Steve looked like he was stifling the urge to roll his eyes. “A colleague of Bruce and Dr. Cho has made major progress on several types of cancer by studying mutants, enhanced people-”

Bucky waved his hand for Steve to skip ahead, and Steve obliged with a sigh. “This latest project centers on testicular cancer, though he’s partnering with several urologists-”

Again, Bucky waved his hand and Steve huffed yet another sigh. “There’s a possibility that they can look into fertility treatments, testosterone therapies, ED-”

Finally, Bucky cut Steve off and stared at him like he was a moron. “Yeah, I got all that. I meant the part where you said they need a biopsy.”

“Yeah, it should just be a needle stick,” Steve confirmed.

Bucky leaned back in his chair. “What part of seventy years of torture and medical experimentation led you to think that I would be on board for this?”

Steve ducked his head. “I didn’t think of it like that, Buck. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked. I was just so excited that we might be able to help people that I forgot all about that.”

Bucky rolled his eyes and sighed. “Jesus, you’re such a boyscout. Just guilt me into it, why don’t you?”

“Bucky, that’s not what I meant. I-”

“Steve, shut up. I’ll do it. I was just giving you a hard time,” Bucky said with a smirk.

 

“Steve!” Bucky shouted. He waited to continue until Steve poked his head into the living room where Bucky was lounging on the sofa with Sam. “Have you read the prep instructions?”

“Yeah, what about them?” Steve asked.

“They want me to shave my balls, Steve. I thought you said this was just a needle stick? Shaving is for surgery. Is this surgery?” Bucky inquired with an air of cautious curiosity. 

Sam snickered as he thumbed the screen on his phone, and Bucky kicked his shin.

Steve looked a little like a cornered rabbit. “They don’t have to put us out or anything. I think they just want to make sure there’s nothing in the way so the sample is clean.”

Bucky nodded like he didn’t believe a single damn word. “But it’s a surgical procedure.”

Steve shrugged. “Cho said it was one needle stick that would take less than five minutes, but I guess technically it is?”

Bucky sighed, got up, and stalked out of the room, leaving the paperwork on the coffee table.

 

“Buck, we need to leave in half an hour. You ready?” Steve called through the bathroom door.

Bucky sighed loud enough to be heard in the hallway. “I’m shaving my goddamn ball sac. Gimme a minute.”

“Do you need some pointers? I shaved this morning,” Steve offered.

Bucky swallowed his laughter and aimed for aggravated when he spoke. “Actually, yeah. Get in here. I’m not a cat and I can’t reach back there far enough to see the back of my nutsack, much less lick it.”

Bucky was naked and leaning back against the tub when Steve stepped in. He glared at Steve like this entire predicament was Steve’s fault, nevermind that Bucky had agreed to all of it. Bucky watched the flushed look of embarrassment on Steve’s face as he knelt in front of Bucky to survey the situation. 

“Uh, well. You got most of it?” Steve tried. He swallowed and tried to put on his mission face, but the fact was dicks never came up on missions. Steve couldn’t quite pull off the seriousness that he was so clearly aiming for, and Bucky had to suppress the urge to giggle. 

Instead, Bucky glared and upped the ante. “Well, since you did such a bang up job on yourself, how about you get me too?”

Steve looked a little sheepish as he took the trimmers out of Bucky’s hand -- never let it be said that Steve Rogers shied away from a challenge -- and sat on the floor in front of him. “Uh, lift up your dick and maybe -- hmm.”

Steve gingerly took hold of Bucky’s balls. He gently stretched the skin smooth and clicked on the trimmers.

Bucky tried not to flinch at the buzz of the trimmers against his sensitive skin, though most of the anxiety came from letting someone else shave him. Even so, Bucky made sure to watch the way that Steve devoted himself to the endeavor, determined not to hurt him. Bucky’s stomach muscles twitched as he held back a chuckle at the blush creeping down Steve’s neck. 

Steve mistook the twitch for pain and cringed. Immediately, he began apologizing. “Sorry, sorry. I know the trimmers kind of grab and pull. I’ll be more careful.”

It didn’t take very long until his crotch was bare. In his care, Steve even got Bucky’s taint. Bucky felt like that was probably overkill, but Steve’s earnest expression was too entertaining to interrupt. When he was done, Steve set the trimmers aside and Bucky rubbed his suddenly very naked skin. 

“Feels funny, doesn’t it?” Steve asked.

Bucky nodded. “Yeah, it’s pretty sensitive.” Bucky paused and then fixed Steve with a knowing look. “Did you take advantage of that?”

Steve blushed so hard he was nearly purple, but smiled and nodded. “First thing. Instructions didn’t say we couldn’t.”

Bucky snorted and gathered himself from the floor, brushing off the stray hairs. “Well, I guess we got this appointment to get to. Too bad. I kinda got half a mind to try it out myself.”

Steve nodded awkwardly and hastened out of the bathroom. 

 

Bucky was sitting on a bed in the pre-surgery area when Steve came in from his pre-op ultrasound blushing down to his toes.

“Enjoy your nurse there, Stevie?” Bucky asked.

Steve glared but didn’t respond until they were sitting alone. “I got hard while the tech was doing the scan. It’s not even like it felt good, it just kind of happened.”

Bucky laughed outright. “Steve, don’t be such a goody-goody. I had the same problem. Tech said most guys do. It’s like a reflex to being pressed on or something. He told me that guys can come from it periodically, even without getting all the way hard.”

Steve muttered something under his breath as he situated himself on the bed adjacent to Bucky’s.

“Repeat that,” Bucky asked, knowing full well what Steve had said.

Steve drew a deep breath and repeated himself. “I said, ‘I wish I had gotten a guy, rather than some sorority girl with double-Ds.’”

Bucky cracked up and Steve turned to see the tech in question standing directly behind him, looking amused but also stunned. Probably something to do with Captain America having a reaction to her breasts. 

“You dropped your pocket knife when you changed into your gown,” she explained, handing the object in question back to him.

Steve mumbled his way through an apology and a ‘thank you’ for his knife. All the while, Bucky snorted and laughed at his awkwardness. By the time the sonographer managed to escape Steve’s bumbling attempts at resolving the situation, she was grinning from ear to ear. Bucky figured she’d be recounting the day that Captain America got flustered by her breasts and then tried to stumble his way through an apology for the next several decades. He had to admit that it was funny enough he wouldn’t be letting it go that easily.

 

Bucky stumbled into the living room right behind Steve. Without regard to anything else, he shucked his pants and yanked off the jock strap that held the ice pack in place. Steve followed suit once he was in the apartment and together they stumbled to the kitchen to raid their large supply of ice packs. 

They were sitting on the sofa, ice packs in place, when Sam opened the door. 

“I brought pizza,” he announced setting it on the dining table.

“Oh no, you gotta bring that over here,” Steve said, motioning at the coffee table.

“Yeah,” Bucky agreed. “We can’t walk because someone thought it was good idea to let a doctor rip out a chunk of our testicles with a fucking needle. Did I mention locals don’t work on us? They don’t work.”

Sam chuckled and mercifully set the pizzas on the coffee table within reach. He also retrieved some plates, paper towels, and glasses of water.

When Sam pulled up a chair on the other side of the coffee table, Bucky set his pizza on his plate.

“You owe me ten dollars,” Bucky stated, holding out his hand.

“Shit. He really did it, huh? Also, I owe you five dollars. That was the bet we made,” Sam reminded as he pulled out his wallet.

Bucky laughed. “Ten because he offered pointers before I ever asked.”

Sam choked on his laughter and handed Bucky the extra five.

When the realization hit Steve, he gaped at the two of them. “You- that was a bet? You didn’t actually need my help?”

Bucky chuckled and shook his head. “Pal, I’ve shaved plenty of times before for Sam. I’m honestly surprised you never noticed. We change around each other all the time.”

Bucky suspected the red currently on Steve’s face was more indignation and less embarrassment. Thankfully, he had until at least tomorrow morning before Steve would be in any shape to spar. 

“Payback’s gonna be bitch, Bucky,” Steve informed him.

Bucky and Sam both laughed.

“I don’t doubt it, Steve. Not one bit.”


End file.
